I am so sorry to say this, but I cannot live with this life anymore. I am sorry to leave you like this. I feel so miserable every day since you got shot at columbine. I’m so sorry I wasn’t there to protect you. I feel like it my fault, all of it. After you were shot I realized I am the most terrible mom in this world. I couldn’t take of you. I just wanted to go somewhere else, where I couldn’t hear all the voices in my head. They kept saying what a bad person I was, that I didn’t deserve to live.
I couldn’t stand listing to it anymore, so I just agreed. The voices were right. I didn’t deserve to live. Anne Marie, my beautiful daughter you deserved better than having me in your way in this terrifying situation you’re in. I know that you are getting better and you moved your legs for the first time last week. Oh Darling I wish I could help you and be there for you in the right way. But I could never live with the thoughts that I might have been able to save you. I know it would have been very difficult to predict that the school shooting would happen. If I just could have done anything. Even if it just would be a little thing, I might have been able to prevent it. I love you so much and you should never doubt that. You are the most fantastic girl in the whole world and I’m going to miss you so much. I will watch over you from the sky above you and help you though every hard situation in your life.
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